Saturday, August 29, 2009

Fulfilling Salt

The salt of my tears
Season the frozen dinner I eat tonight
You said you would call
You said, we would meet at 8:30
I sent you a message at 8:45
Receiving no reply
By 9:20, I was hungry
You never fail at being deceiving
I have grown to find my tears
Much more fulfilling
and alway reliable.

Friday, August 28, 2009

I'm Sorry

I'm sorry

I try every day

Guiding my head to overtake my heart

Pulling on the heart strings

This way and That

The balancing act of a life time

Redirecting the attachment

In an upstream motion

Even my head, be of a trickery at times

Telling me it is okay

Validating invalid actions

Allowing my heart to be free

I tell myself over

No, this can not be

I am sorry

I am trying


Sometimes my heart

Overturns my head

Sometimes my head deceives me

I seek for the strength day after day

And, still, I can't help but

Love you.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

I have it

I have it
cupping it in my delicate fingers
grasping its aromas
fulfilling my inner need
of want and desire
placing it down for one moment
wanting it
wondering, do i have enough
am i prepared to go without
did i plan accordingly
for the time when it runs out
will i be left longing
wanting more
for this moment, i have it
pondering the moment when
i will no longer
do i consume it
or does it consume me

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Relating Evolution

as the oceans are calm
lit by the effervescent lighting of the sun
rising and falling
creating the backdrop of a serene
moment in time
where on-lookers stop for a moment
to appreciate this passing
of which will never be the same

they look toward
the happy couple
with beauty and grace of which
bodies aligned naturally
in tune with one another
easing closer
with a comfortable silence

look beneath the surface of that same ocean
the habitats striving to exist
pollutants of the world around
adding pressure to survive against
against rivals and food chains
a once smooth surface
hidden within
the whirl tide of existence
that shall prosper
recreating its evolution
so much more to be seen
to survive, below the surface

the happy couple
publicly pronounced as 'perfect'
innately surrendering to compromise
in a world where competitive boundaries
lay no more
battling the storms of rough tides
and bigger fish
they struggle to exist
as one
calm on the outside
with a whirl wind of life
recreating self to accommodate
bound with strength and confidence
in their imperfections

so, they too, sit with the public eye
observing the beauty of God's light
and know,
there is so much more below the surface
it is the understanding of acceptance
that makes it perfect
that makes it surreal
that makes it ever changing
giving life the strength to exist
in the beauty of this night
where on-lookers pause
in reflection
of evolution

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Note to self: Loves Destination

If being loved were a destination,
then I would buy a ticket

An exotic foreign land to me
To be fully appreciated,
for who I am
flaws and strengths combined as one
to create the perfect human being to another
To be so fortunate to find the complemental one
of whom to share this life

If there were only a simple way to make things happen
Taking a trip straight into the arms of another
to save all the turmoil and avoid all the agony,
of mishaps and bad decisions along the way
maybe then I could find that sustainable relationship

Choosing men who are unattainable
Making that choice, because I choose me,
to love myself
with a shell of protection around
my mental storm
I am scarred, but if I were not,
I would love to be loved wholly by another
No games to be played, or convenient ways,
just pure and simple love

So many souls stand alone;
they stand alone-together-because it is safe
Safe knowing what to expect,
because you are in control,
of your emotions, your mind,
your money, your matters
When you love yourself,
how can you possible trust another
With the most valuable and precious thing you have?
Or so I tell myself, a sheet of comfort.

Some say this desire is attainable
This life of love happens everyday
Just check your baggage at the gate
and let love find its way
But I have lost my faith
Faith in the good of people

To be loved full heartily,
if it were a destination,
I would surely buy the ticket

one way, no return.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

2:00 am

It is 2:00 am,
the night owl perches his broken wing
upon my window sill
Big, hollow eyes peeking in
Blinking morse code
‘let me in, let me in,
I can fly no longer’

It is 2:00 am,
I am the night owl,
perched with a lonely heart
upon the edge of my bed
Big, empty eyes peeking out into the darkness
Blinking morse code
‘let me out, let me out,
I can hide no longer’

It is 2:00 am,
they look towards one another
to find the meaning
in this chance encounter
Both broken, both yearning
One seeking shelter
One longing for flight
It is here at 2:00 am
They find their answers

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Beginning of the End

God opens the door,
"Hey, girl, what took you so long?"
I look into her bemused eyes,
grinning and shaking my head, I say,
"Oh, Lord, you have really screwed it up this time"
She chuckles, wraps her arm around my shoulder,
guiding me in,
"Come and sit, tell me all about it"

With lattes and biscottis, we sit cross legged in the garden
and I begin....

Sunday, August 9, 2009


Do you know the feeling?

you are looking, searching
high and low
for that important key
of which you can not leave
retracing your steps of when
you last held it
used it
the key to get in
the key to escape
where has it gone?
without it you could not be here
perhaps you are meant to stay...

Friday, August 7, 2009


I refuse to stand around and wait
For you to wake up
To fully appreciate the love,
that I am
I refuse to be patient,
any longer
You Say You Love Me
show me
with actions
Not Words
show me you care
Not with Kissessss
but motives
Not with excuses
but Involvement
At once I was complacent,
No longer
I, now, am Me
as I once I was...
without thee.
Stop talking.
Show me,
let it be.
What it is
I am alone.

Monday, August 3, 2009


"Cross My Heart
I wish I could Smell
The Tears in Your Eyes
Bring Me Close
Bring Me Into Your Heart"
he whispers...
she looks
through him
past him
to find love